Book Review: The Book of Lost Things

No, I haven't abandoned the blog! I know we only have 3 followers as of yet, but hopefully the word spreads (especially now that I'm back on). Anyway, I've read a couple of books since the last time I posted, and reviews for them will be up shortly.

Today's review is for The Book of Lost Things by: John Connolly.
As usual *SPOILER ALERT*

Overall Rating: 8 out of 10 stars

In The Book of Lost Things, 12-year-old David, while trying to cope with the death of his mother, the new woman his father married, and his hatred for his new step-brother Georgie, accidently steps into a fantasy world filled with fairy tale characters. Drawn by wonder, and the promise that the king of this world will help him get back to his own, David travels through this fairy-tale world, guided by Roland (from Robert Browning's poem Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came). On his way he meets fairy tale characters we're used to (i.e. Snow White), and some that we aren't (i.e. The Goose Girl). But David realizes that not everything he knew about fairy tales is true in this world, and soon uncovers a dark plot that the king himself is involved in.

I give this book an 8 out of 10 stars. Although Connolly's prose can sometimes be boring, it overall flows very well, even imitating that of a fairy tale. Some of the fairy tales allusions can be difficult to understand, as Connolly changes them and uses some less common tales, but the version shown above (with the red cover) has an appendix devoted to explaining the references, and containing the actual tales themselves. It's not a particularly fast read, but you don't want it to be fast. Connolly stirs up emotions so well, that you truthfully never want the story to end.

On a side note, if you've never read Robert Browning's Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came, I highly suggest it. It's a great poem, and serves as the inspiration to Stephen King's Dark Tower series, which are some of my favorite books.

As always, I hope this review was helpful! Happy reading!

Book Review: Breaking Dawn

Review by Cassie, a.k.a. awesomely cool Twi-fan (but that’s an oxymoron, so… :P )

8.4 out of 10 stars

MAJOR SPOILER ALERT, although if you’re reading these reviews you’ve probably read the book anyway.

After the disappointment that was Eclipse, it’s nice to read something with a little more substance. Meyer’s last installment of the Twilight Saga may not have the action that the other books have, but it’s a nice ending to what is arguably the most popular teen series ever. Yes, I said ever.

Basic outline- Bella and Edward get married, Jacob doesn’t like it (especially since Bella plans on having sex with her husband who can easily snap her spine in half), Bella gets pregnant (didn’t see that one coming), names her daughter Renesmee (which is easily the worst name I’ve ever heard in my life), and Jacob imprints on this tiny half vampire creature thing. Bella is turned into a vampire. I like this so far. There’s not really a major conflict yet, but it’s enough to sink my teeth into for now.

After all this, the real conflict arrives. Renesmee is spotted by a vampire from another clan, who thinks she is a child the Cullens bit so they could play house forever (or something like that). Making child vampires is against the vampire code, so the Volturi are immediately alerted. Now the Volturi are on their way to Forks to destroy the child who has been dubbed “Nessie”, because Renesmee is a terrible name. Jasper and Alice skip out on the Cullens (or so we think), but leave clues for Bella to follow so Nessie and Jacob can run away from the Volturi and be safe. The Cullens, knowing that the Volturi have been misinformed, start to gather friends from across the world to make a stand against them. Their friends add a lot to the story, mostly because they break up the monotony of having the same characters throughout the series.

And THEN, after all that, the Volturi arrive looking for a fight, but decide to talk about their problems with the Cullens instead. Oh, and Bella can now shield anyone in the vicinity from mind attacks, which upsets Jane and Alec, whose powers affect opponents’ minds. After talking for a while, when everyone is about to fight… JASPER AND ALICE TO THE RESCUE! Along with another guy. This other guy is half vampire, half human, and convinces the Volturi to leave Nessie and her family alone, because once these half breeds reach adulthood, they’re fine. No big deal.

So after hundreds of pages of preparing for a fight, the Volturi leave, never to bother the Cullens again. Well, until they have some other reason to destroy them. And the Cullens, plus Jacob, live happily ever after.

But wait, hold on a sec! Werewolves aren’t undead, are they? Actually, if you remember correctly, one of the early chief werewolves lived three human lives before he imprinted on a woman, and only then did he give up his furry ways to grow old with his imprint-ee. Seeing as Nessie is undead, Jacob won’t ever age, either.

I’m getting exhausted just outlining the plot! But let’s look at the actual writing. It’s undeniable that Meyer has matured exponentially since writing Twilight. The story actually flows together seamlessly, without the gaping holes in plot and character development found in the first book. Meyer’s writing got progressively smoother and more grown-up as the series continued. Like almost every other author on the market, Meyer needed a few years to really get a good sense of who she was as a writer. I believe that after two books, she really blossomed as a novelist. The writing in Eclipse and Breaking Dawn is on a completely different level than Twilight and New Moon. Her adult novel, the Host, which was written somewhere between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn, only furthers my point. The Host is the best example of Meyer’s skill as an author, I believe. Maybe I’ll do a review of that one next.

Besides the obvious growth and maturity of Meyer throughout the process, The Twilight Saga has a good message. Between the fluff and sometimes annoyingly extreme characters, the whole point of the books is that Bella follows her heart and loves with everything she has. Yes, there’s conflicting feelings and yes, her love starts out as simple infatuation, but at the end of it all, nothing can come between her and the love she has not only for Edward, but for Nessie, Jacob, and the rest of her family. It’s true that the books don’t teach a whole lot about values or morality, but the overriding factor is the incredible amount of love Bella possesses for the people in her life. It’s a message worth writing about.

They’re not the greatest works of literature, nor do they stimulate the mind like other books do, but Stephenie Meyer has created a cultural phenomenon that will not soon be forgotten. As a fan of the books before the movies came out, I can easily say that I truly enjoyed reading all four books in the Twilight Saga. I look forward to whatever Meyer comes up with next, and I hope we can continue to enjoy her writing for years to come.

David’s Review


3 out of 10 stars



Well, it’s finally been done. I’ve pushed my way through all four of the Twilight books. Now, if I’m correct, you’ve just gasped at the rating I’ve given this book for one of two reasons:

1. You’ve just realized that Cassie and I have a 5.4 star rating difference in our reviews

OR

2. You’ve just realized that I’ve rated Breaking Dawn the highest of all of the four books in the series.

Cassie outlined the plot in the above review well enough, so I’ll go ahead and start my complaining as usual. The beginning of the book starts with Bella (still) worrying about getting married. Edward gave her a nice new shiny car that we never hear about ever again. The two get married at a beautiful ceremony put together all by Alice-the only vampire worth liking. Finally, the two go on vacation to an island that was purchased by Carlisle (Edward’s vampire-daddy) for Esme (Carlisle’s mate (yes, I say “mate” not wife, as vampires aren’t considered human)). Here we learn that Bella is the stereotypical male in a relationship while Edward is a stereotypical woman. Bella’s sex-crazy, while Edward just wants to please her.

Not surprisingly Bella gets pregnant.

Here, we go into a whole new section of the book, focused on our furry-friend Jacob. Truthfully, I enjoyed this section (which means a lot, coming from me, the biggest Twi-hater there is). We live through Jacob’s eyes as he learns that he can stand up for what he wants, and finally imprints on Renesmee, Bella’s half-vampire half-human daughter. Lovely. In fact, I believe this would be the perfect ending to the entire series. Everybody gets what they want, Bella’s a vampire, and Jacob found his true love. Unfortunately, we’re only halfway through Breaking Dawn.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I love some good fantasy- in fact, fantasy is probably my favorite genre- and I would have accepted the vampire-human that is Renesmee. The problem is, it seems like Meyer couldn’t accept her, and decide to take the scientific approach to explaining the baby’s existence. This is her theory (expressed through Carlisle):

1. Humans have 23 pairs of chromosomes. (This is absolutely true)

2. Werewolves have 24 pairs of chromosomes. (Explaining their difference to humans)

3. Vampires have 25 pairs of chromosomes. (Also explaining their difference)

Here’s the issue though: if you have 23 pairs of chromosomes, you can only mate with something that also has 23 pairs. Therefore, Renesmee is physically impossible. And, if we’re taking a scientific approach, the werewolves should have died out with the first generation, as they wouldn’t be able to breed with humans anyway. Also, Edward shouldn’t be able to mate with Bella, as you need blood running through your veins to perform said task.

Anyway, the Volturi, the law-keepers in the vampire world mistake Renesmee (we’ll call her Nessie, like Jacob) as an immortal child, or a child that was bitten by a vampire. It’s against vamp-law to do this, and they want to kill the Cullens. The Cullens then team together to gather a vast variety of other vampires to try to tell the Volturi otherwise. They prepare to fight the Volturi, in case they aren’t willing to listen. The werewolves promise to help too.

(At this points my thoughts were something along the lines of: Sweet! Epic vampire/werewolf battle!)

Unfortunately, Meyer once again disappoints. The battle scene begins, and the Volturi talk with the Cullens and their friends. Suddenly Alice and Jasper come back from their mysterious disappearance with another human-vampire mix, and the battle’s over, as the Volturi see that Nessie is the same. No epic battle scene. A cliché happy ending. How…Twilight-esque.

Here’s a list of many of my complaints:

1. Hair kissing/smelling is super gross, and I’ve been sick of it since book one. Seriously, Stephenie, stop it.

2. Bella, about sex says, “…I can’t imagine life gets any better than that.” Setting a great example for the millions upon millions of Twi-hards.

3. The Cullens can cook quite well for a family that eats off of raw animal flesh and blood.

4. Edward wants to use Bella, for example: “Sex was the key all along?...I could have saved myself a lot of arguments…”

5. Bella says she connects with Jacob on a level that she can’t with Edward. Wait…why exactly didn’t she marry Jacob then?

6. If I’m correct, Bella says “I love you” at least twice to Jacob before uttering it once to Edward.

7. Meyer seems to be unable to hinder her use of the word “masochist”, she must be one herself.

8. Edward wants Bella to get over Jacob. Seriously, even he realizes she still likes him. Why did she marry Edward?

9. Bella swears she doesn’t still love Jacob, yet she wants to name her baby after him, if it’s a boy.

10. Until this book, I didn’t think Meyer’s descriptions of Edward could become more annoying…they can.

11. Bella never achieves anything…seriously, the Cullens hand her everything (a car, a cell phone, a house).

12. Bella: “Our time on the island had been the epitome of my human life”-Bella lived for sex. That’s a great example, is it not?

13. Bella is upset that her 18 year-old friend fell in love with her newborn daughter by magic, but not that a 150 year-old vampire fell in love with her by chance? Ah…I see

14. Why would Meyer want to make Jacob a persisting issue? It’s too hard to make problems in plots…it’s far easier to make him imprint on Renesmee.

15. Of course, Meyer, skip the battle scene. They’ll just have a calm debate and the Volturi will leave.

16. No joke, Meyer describes the clothing of the characters. I still have no idea what many of the characters look like physically, just that they wear button downs, or sweaters.

17. Breaking Dawn is definitely a Twilight book…a build up to an anticlimactic ending. How wonderful.

18. Seriously, in four books, Meyer never writes ONE battle scene.

19. Leah's problem of being the only female werewolf is never once solved. Why is she the only one to have ever existed? Is it a genetic problem? Did the large amount of vampires spark it? Meyer could have referenced here to many problems today of sexism and sexuality, yet instead left a gaping hole.

I have to end this, or this review is going to be crazy long. So, here we go: as in the last book, I took a tally. The two tallies this time are the “Barf tally” for anything extremely gross/overly romantic, and the “Adjective tally” for the times that Meyer overly describes Edward as perfect. The total for the barf tally is 11%! Yes, that’s right, 11% of this book makes David barf! The total for the adjective tally is 5.84%, meaning that 1/20 of this book is describing Edward.

Certainly, this obsession isn’t going to leave anytime soon, but in my opinion it’s quite possible the worst obsession there is. The books are highly overrated, and really, have nothing much to be praised about. My average rating for the series is 2 stars, and nothing anybody says can make my mind change that.

Book Review: Eclipse

*SPOILER ALERT*

David’s Review


2 out of 10 stars

If, like me, you have pushed through the first three books of Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight series, I commend you greatly. You my friend have conquered complete boredom, plot-less-ness, and completely clichéd romance scenes. Also, I’m sorry that you were unfortunate enough to read the first three books. But, this review isn’t about the other three books in the series. It’s about Eclipse, the third book.

It’s hard even to find a place to start this review. Do I start at the age level it’s aimed for and its appropriateness for that level? Or do I start at the cheesiness? Maybe the boredom I experienced while reading it? Yes, that seems like a good place to start.

In pattern with the other three books, Eclipse starts plot-less. Yes, it does seem that the first chapter may be meaningful to the plot, but really, that’s not the main part of the plot, and could be used without. Instead, once again, we’re forced to sit through chapters of bad romance (rah rah ah ah ah!), and Bella complaining more about (what else?) a party. But now, it’s a graduation party! Way to change it up there, Mrs. Meyer. I will admit one thing that I actually liked about the book was the use of intercalary chapters for use of exposition. It really is interesting to learn the background stories of many of the minor and major characters. Unfortunately, these chapters come in sudden succession, and, instead of giving each story a chapter, Meyer uses dialogue to portray these stories, and it causes slight boredom, as not much imagery can be used through dialogue.

Here’s the basic run-down of the plot (WARNING: PG-13 RATING FOR ADULT THEMES):

Jacob’s still angry with Bella. Bella, with the help of her amazingly awesome, perfect, beautiful, boyfriend (I’m sorry Stephanie, I know that wasn’t nearly as many adjectives as you used to describe him), has finally been accepted into a college, in Alaska, so, when she’s a vampire she won’t sparkle in the sun. Edward wants Bella to marry him. She says not until we have sex. He says too bad. INTERCALARY CHAPTERS. Newborn vampires, under the control of Victoria are trying to kill Bella. GRADUATION PARTY. The werewolves and vampires team up to fight the newborns. INTERCALARY CHAPTERS. Edward and Bella fight more about sex and marriage. The battle starts. After convincing Edward to stay with her, Bella once again fights with him about having sex. CLIMACTIC SCENE (which is slightly less anticlimactic than the climaxes in the other books). More arguing between Edward and Bella. She agrees to marry him, though still wants to have sex. THE END.

I don’t know if the rest of you realize this, but Bella wants to have SEX with Edward! I know fourth-graders who are reading this book! Let me repeat that, FOURTH-GRADERS, and this book is aimed toward that age group! So, Meyer, do you really think that’s appropriate?

Not only does that make it age-inappropriate, it adds a new (or should I say, the first) level to the conflict. Bella thinks that getting married to the person she’s madly in love with, is like, totally 1987! And, Edward, thinking the opposite, decides to USE Bella’s lust against her. Yes, I did just use the word use, Edward USES Bella, and yet, she remains in love with him. He tells her, “There is only [the marriage] that I want to speed up…your impatient human hormones are my most powerful ally at this point.” He uses her, so she’ll marry him, and she doesn’t even want to! On marriage she says, “It’s not really my idea…but yet. It means a lot to him. I figure, why not?” Isn’t this book so romantic, and not sexist?

All this while, our lovely, extremely talented author (HA!), throws in many, many make-out scenes that make no sense. Apparently, while your boyfriends lips are on your neck, and yours are in his hair, you can have deep intellectual conversation, or, at least, that’s what Meyer believes. Since the other two were what I call “barf-tastic” I decided that I would tally the number of times the romance got out of control and clichéd. My number: 102. With simple math, using the formula barf-moments/page numbers, I figured that 16.2% of this book was dedicated to making me barf. Yes, almost a fifth of this book made me barf.

As usual, there’s much, much more I could say about this book, but I’ll try to keep the review as short as possible. My recommendation is on par with the other two novels. If you haven’t read it already, there’s nothing spectacular you’re missing.

Cassie's Review:
6 stars on a good day, 5.5 stars on a bad day (out of 10, of course)


Although Eclipse was a necessary element in the Twilight Saga, it makes no impression on the literary world, good or otherwise. The lack of substance is deplorable, and although it flows better than both Twilight and New Moon, there’s nothing for the reader to grasp.

The story is predictable. Edward and Jacob are now at odds because they’re both in love with Bella, Bella is stupid and wishy washy as usual, and something about an army of newborn vampires (I can’t really recall exactly what). Basically, you get a few hundred pages of fluff, with some good vocabulary thrown in (impending mania, anyone?). And then, get this, Bella realizes she’s In love with both Edward and Jacob, she just loves Edward more. Someone get her a reality check, please.

So far I’ve been pretty negative (although not nearly as bad as my co-reviewer, I’m sure). I’ll throw in a good note. Meyers ties up the whole Victoria problem nicely and with some action, and if you’re Team Jacob, like me, you realize that Bella is ridiculous and Jacob is the obvious choice for anyone. Edward is a little too altruistic to be considered realistic in any way. Edward seriously needs to put up a fight for the person he says he loves so much. And no, it’s not the “if you really love them, you’ll let them go” argument. Edward’s selflessness has now become too annoying to bear, while Jacob seems more like a real person who might actually exist (werevolfishnesss aside). And, above all, the secondary characters are really what makes the book worth reading. We find out about the vampires’ backgrounds, the wolf pack history, and readers get a better sense of the world that Bella lives in.

Although I can’t say it was a great book, the necessity of it is really what makes it a decent read (for those who like the series, anyway). However, if you didn’t like the first two, you’ll hate Eclipse that much more. I apologize for the lack of substance. Breaking Dawn makes up for it, so just stick around for one more book.

Again, if you don’t like the Twilight Saga but want to give Meyer a try, read The Host. It’s got substance, that’s for sure.

Have a good summer, and read a good book.

Movie Review: Monster Starring Charlize Theron and Christina Ricci

This is Artistically Speaking's first ever movie review, so kindly thank JP, would you?

A prostitute, a lover, and a series of murders. This is a biographical-drama that really makes your stomach turn. Based on the true stories of a 1980's prostitute named Aileen(Theron) who was raped at a young age and finds true love, a outcast trying to be accepted for who she is, Selby(Ricci). The two meet when Aileen walks into a gay/lesbian bar in hopes of getting a drink. Selby makes a move in, and the paranoid Aileen is in attack mode. The two fall in love after a intense cinematic moment where the two confirm the attraction with a passionate kiss to the song, "Don't Stop Believing."

In the ambition to meet up later, Aileen needs money to take her on a date, and when trying to make the money, a man beats Aileen and rapes her. This reawakes Aileen's past of her childhood where she was first raped at the age of six, and was beaten by her own father for accusing his friend. Aileen escapes, and kills the man shooting him with a full round of a pistol. She then steals his clothes, and takes Selby to a hotel where the two try to live together in love, and try to make it. The two are dirt poor, and Selby eventually gets suicidal about her life on how she threw away a future for herself, and convinces herself the only way the two can make it is if Aileen goes back to hooking. In high hopes she does, and murders almost all of the people she is picked up by. Eventually it catches up with her in the end, where she kills an ex cop, and is found later. She takes all the blame and leaves Selby innocent, and is taken into prison for twelve years.
I really appreciated the acting in this movie for the first part because I really loved how intense it would get. There was emotional breakdowns that really pulled at my gut. Also, along the same note of great acting, the scenes of them all being in the car, and the first move would be made, in a disrespectful notion, you could see the heart wrench in Aileen's eyes. There is also a very uncomfortable scene of a pity sexual act, and nude scenes.
I disliked how it looked a Lifetime film, but this totally was not. The graphic actions in this was enough to earn this to never be played on TV. Other than that I'd say it was a good film.
One symbol I really liked was the song, "Don't Stop Believing" was really all there was in the song. The ambition to become something that the two always wanted....love.
I'd recommend this film for people who are very open to films, and comfortable to see some graphic sex scenes. If you are not able to handle cussing, blood, crude actions and homosexuality, this film isnt for you.

I'd give it 7/10.

I know the film is old, but I really enjoyed it.

Summer Reading List

Hello all! I know I haven't posted much lately, but I promise, the next book review (Eclipse By: Stephanie Meyer) will be up shortly. Until then I thought I'd post what I'd like to try to read this summer:
Breaking Dawn-Stephanie Meyer
The Book of Dave-Will Self
The City of Ember-Jeanne DePrau
The People of Sparks-Jeanne DePrau
The Prophet of Yonwood-Jeanne DePrau
Voices From the Stree-Phillip K. Dick
The Butt-Will Self
The Book of Lost Things-John Connolly
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime-Mark Haddon
'Salem's Lot-Stephen King
Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil-John Berendt
Interview With the Vampire-Anne Rice
The Talisman-Stephen King and Peter Straub
Black House-Stephen King and Peter Straub
Eragon-Christopher Paolini
Eldest-Christopher Paolini
Brisngr-Christopher Paolini
The Keys to the Kingdom Series-Garth Nix
The Life od Pi-Yann Martel
The Phantom Tollbooth-Norton Juster
The Tale of Despereaux-Kate DiCamillo
The Schwa was Here-Neal Shusterman
The End of Mr. Y-Scarlett Thomas
Lisey's Story-Stephen King
The Giver-Lois Lowry
Gathering Blue-Lois Lowry
Messenger-Lois Lowry
A Series of Unfortunate Events-Lemony Snicket
The Chronicles of Narnia-C.S. Lewis
A Fine Dark line-Joe R. Lansdale
Gone-Michael Grant


Now, I know that this list alone looks excesive, but you also have to figure in that I didn't put the "series" books in. The Keys to the Kingdom consists of seven books, as does The Chronicles of Narnia. A Series of Unfortunate Events is comprised of thirteen. So, my list is 54 books long. I've also sorted them (on a seperate piece of paper) into what's top priority and what's not, because many of these books, I would just like to re-read.
If you've read any of these books, tell me your opinion of them int the comments below. Thanks!

Book Review: New Moon

Once again, Cassie and I team up to write a review. This time, we review the sequel to Twilight by Stephenie Meyer, New Moon. Since, my review was first last time, Cassie's will be first this time. As usual SPOILER ALERT!

Cassie's Review:

New Moon- 8 out of 10 stars

She’s done it again. Stephenie Meyer has spawned yet another cultural phenomenon in the form of New Moon. How does she do it? Meyer’s second novel, coupled with its wildly successful movie, fueled the Twi-mania that has taken the country’s teenage population by storm. There’s even been a rise in the number of werewolf novels on the Teen shelves at bookstores. It seems that New Moon has taken the popularity of the Twilight Saga to new heights (it also happens to be my personal favorite book of the series). Why? Let’s look.

I try not to spoil here, but let’s be real, most everyone in the English-speaking world knows what’s up. Edward breaks up with Bella in the beginning of the novel; Bella had been nearly slaughtered at her birthday party by Jasper when she got a paper cut, so the family moves away for her sake (but she thinks Edward stopped loving her, so she doesn’t know the full extent of it). After screaming fits, tantrums, nightmares, and a general apathetic view of life, Charlie threatens to send Bella back to her mom. Bella goes to a movie with a friend to appease Charlie, and through an encounter with a few creepers at a bar, Bella realizes she hears Edward’s voice when she’s in danger. So Bella obtains a couple motorcycles and turns to Jacob Black for assistance repairing them. Its obvious Jacob has a crush on Bella, and they really are best friends, but then Jacob gets “sick” and tries to cut ties, which sends Bella on a downward path toward depression for the second time. Bella tries to make amends, is shaken off by Jacob, and can’t make heads or tails, all the while having strange dreams about wolves and Edward. She figures out, after a little help from a midnight visit from Jacob, that Jacob is a werewolf. Why can’t Bella be monster-free? It would seem she’s a walking supernatural magnet.

Here’s the secondary conflict: Weird deaths have been happening in Forks, and the police think it’s some kind of wild animal. It’s actually Victoria, the sadist vampire mate of James, who Edward killed in a life or death kerfuffle in Twilight. Victoria is looking for Bella; the way she sees it, she has to kill Bella to get back at Edward for killing James. The werewolves are trying to find her, but she keeps evading them. An intriguing secondary storyline, if you ask me. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

After a few chapters of this werewolf versus vampire deal, Alice shows up at Bella’s house. Through yet another unlikely set of circumstances, Edward thinks Bella committed suicide, and is going to the Volturi clan in Italy so they can kill him (vampires have very few options as far as ending their own life, you see). Bella and Alice go to stop him, and stop him they do. I won’t spoil the ending, but I’ll say that it kind of unexpected.

Meyer has obviously improved her writing since Twilight. The plot ambles along with fewer bumps and better quality character development, especially for Jacob. He goes from an eager teenager with a crush on Bella to a mature, responsible young man with an even bigger crush on Bella. The absence of Edward gives readers a better understanding of Bella’s character. We all know she’s still irrational, love-crazed, and ignorant, but we see her in moments of elation, moments of compassion, and in moments of extreme despair. Also, Bella’s struggle with her “failed” relationship with Edward, though very difficult to relate to, is described by Meyer in a way that helps the reader feel compassion for Bella and her plight. In addition, Bella’s mixed feelings about her relationship with Jacob make her seem more human and less fictional, in my opinion; her extreme reaction to Edward’s absence is heartbreaking. Anyone with a heart will feel sympathy for Bella (although I suppose my fellow reviewer won’t share my views on this subject). Meyer’s writing in New Moon is more advanced and less frustrating than Twilight. Props to her, but she still has room for improvement.

Even the most outspoken opposition of this series can’t deny one simple, irrefutable fact: Stephenie Meyer has created a figurative tidal wave in the world of literature. It’s gone as far as to divide readers into two distinct categories (although there are a few fans that are on outlier teams): Team Edward and Team Jacob. However you put it, New Moon has heightened Meyer’s status as one of the most prominent writers of our generation, and the best is yet to come.


David's Review:
1 out of 10 stars


Upon reading the first book in this series, Twilight, I thought it impossible that I would ever read a book worse then it. Unfortunately, after reading New Moon, I was proven wrong. Personally, I believe this book should have been called Twilight 2.0 Now With Werewolves, because, that’s all it was, the same exact plot line (or lack of) as the original, but now with new monsters.

Like in the original book, I must bring up the fact of plot. In the beginning, I thought that there might actually be one, what with Edward leaving, but then it vanishes into thin air, not to return until almost halfway through the book. But, even worse, it disappears at the end, causing a perfect set-up for Meyer to (unfortunately) write a third book. So, let’s examine our plot, and the irrational actions of our characters (mainly Bella).

It starts with Bella’s eighteenth birthday, and the Cullen’s, the family of vampires Bella has grown close to because of her dating Edward, throwing her a party. Somehow, Bella manages to cut herself on a piece of tape (don’t ask me how, because I’m pretty sure nobody can actually do this). This causes Jasper, the most recent addition to the Cullen clan, to go crazy over the scent of her blood. Edward then pushes her back into a table with a cake and glass plates on it (I’m not sure why they have glass plates around Bella, because she’s admittedly clumsy), causing Bella to receive multiple more injuries, and almost all the Cullens to leave to stop themselves from eating her, which, in my opinion, would have made the book better. After this whole ordeal, Edward decides it’s best to leave Bella, to keep her safe, and tells her not to do stupid things (which after Twilight, is a little bit of a joke).

The plot then fades to nothing as Bella goes through a time of what appears to be Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, which really makes me wonder. Raise your hand if any of you, after dating somebody for around a year would begin having night terrors about them, and not be able to function regularly for months. Wait, none of you put your hands up! Oh yeah, I just remembered, nobody acts like that. I mean, seriously Stephanie Meyer, I understand it’s a fictional work involving vampires and werewolves, but everybody still has to act rationally, otherwise the story will be even more unbelievable.

The only person Bella finds solace in is her Native American friend, Jacob Black. She then finds out that when she’s reckless and stupid, as Edward told her not to be, she hears this perfect voice (here we go with the whole perfection thing every time Edwards around). Bella now begins to use Jacob so she can have crazy adrenaline rushes and hear Edward’s voice again. But, over time, Bella begins to fall for Jacob, and eventually, can’t tell if she loves him or Edward.

This again brings up the argument of love or infatuation. Does Bella love Jacob, or does she love Edward? Has she ever actually loved either of them? Does she love both of them? Personally, I think Bella wants to have a masculine figure by her side at all times, which once again ruins Meyer’s premise, because Bella’s dad is a police officer, one of the best suited people to protect her.

Bella decides she loves Edward and continues using Jacob. Fast forward, because it gets pretty boring. Jacob avoids Bella. Fast forward. Bella meets the vampire Laurent, an enemy from Twilight, and is saved by five giant wolves. Fast forward. Jacob’s a werewolf, meant to protect the people of La Push (the reservation) and Forks from vampires. The werewolves vow to protect Bella from Victoria, who’s out to kill her after Edward killed her vampire mate, James.

So finally, after a lot of boring things, Jacob promises Bella that they will go cliff diving. But, on the day they want to cliff dive, the wolves think they can catch Victoria. Bella decides that she’ll jump off the tallest cliff all by herself. She nearly drowns, which, once again, would have been a better ending. Seeing that Bella jumped off a cliff, and thinking she died, Alice comes to Forks to console Charlie. Lo and behold though, Bella’s alright. So the two of them catch a plane to Italy to stop Edward from killing himself (he can’t live if Bella doesn’t). In another anticlimactic ending, that is only slightly more thrilling than the ending in Twilight, Bella stops Edward. The end.

I gave this book one out of ten stars for many reasons. The plot is completely unoriginal, as it’s basically the same series of events that happened in the first book, only with werewolves instead of vampires. The writing is just as bad, if not worse than the original, which is odd because you think Meyer would get better as she wrote, but I guess some people just aren’t talented, right? The clichés are over the top and just horrible. The ending when Bella learns that Edward left because he loved her, made me, and probably anybody with a drop of testosterone in them, want to barf, a lot. Overall, this was just a terrible book, and I wouldn’t recommend it even as punishment for criminals.

Book Review: The Lightning Thief

7 stars out of 10

Okay, so really, I probably would have never read this book if they weren't making it into a movie (which, after reading the book, looks nothing similar). But, me being me, I have to read the book before I see the film version. It's like book etiquette. Anyway, to the review.

SPOILER ALERT

Enter Percy Jackson, a twelve-year-old, who has gone to many different schools in his life and is now at Yancy Academy. The book starts off with him on a field trip to their local museum at the Greek exhibit. Fast forward a few pages...his pre-algebra teacher Mrs. Dodds turns into a Fury, a half-woman half-bat creature. His Latin teacher, Mr. Brunner throws him a pen, which, while in the air, turns into a sword. Fast forward some more. Mrs. Dodds is gone, and nobody believes she was there to begin with, and, after an incident at the museum, Percy gets kicked out of another school.

After returning home, his mother takes him to their beach home, but a hurricane strikes. His friend Grover randomly appears, and the three drive away from the storm, Grover and Percy's mom trying to protect Percy from the storm, apparently made to attack him.

Well, after defeating a minotaur that killed his mother Percy learns that he is the son of Poseidon. He then finds out somebody has stolen Zeus's lightning bolt (hence the title), but, since no god can take the symbol of another god, Percy has been framed. Now, he must find who actually stole the lighning bolt, and return it to Zeus before the summer solstice.

So, I know this book was meant for a younger audience, such as elementary and middle school kids, but it has a well developed plot. Yes, it is a little predictable (I figure out the twist ending right away), but to those who it's aimed for it would be a very good twist. It would help a lot if you had a basic understanding of Greek mythology before you read this book, but it's not totally important. Rick Riordan (the author) really does a good job of explaining every one of the Greek charcters without going into long spiels about each one of them. So, I gave it a 7 out of 10. Look for more reviews for this series soon!

Book Review: Twilight

Today, we'll be reviewing the book Twilight by Stephanie Meyer, a very recent, and very controversial novel. Now, by controversial, I don't mean that it is particularly offensive to a certain group of people, nor does it spark ethical arguments. Instead, it has sparked an issue about it's quality. Is it good? Is it bad? But the major controversy is how it is viewed by both genders. So here at Artistically Speaking, we've decided to do two points of view in this review. One from a girl, and one from a guy.

*SPOILER ALERT*

David's Review:
2 out of 10 stars
Of all the well written books I've read, Twilight, definitely is not one of them, for many, many reasons. We'll start off with the first, and one of the easiest to recognize. Meyer has no real character development in the book, and even when she does, she often contradicts it. For example, take our main character, and narrator, Bella Swan.
We believe she is an intellectual character and unpopular being the new girl in town. She also convinces us that, no matter how hard she tries, she can't lie to save her life. As the book progresses she makes very unintellectual choices, such as lying to her dad when she's about to meet Edward, the vampire who wants to suck her blood, alone in the forest. Although Bella is new in town, she is suddenly popular and is invited to go shopping with her new friends. While shopping, she decides she wants to go hunting for a bookstore, alone, in a city she's never been to before, also knowing that she is clumsy. Obviously, she gets lost, and almost attacked by a group of men. Intellectual, I think not. And her lying skills, apparently very good when they help the story, easily convincing her dad, Charlie, that she broke up with Edward.
Next, up, the plot, or maybe, the fact that there is none until the book is more than halfway over. We start out the book with Bella telling us she's moving to Forks, for an unknown reason, later revealed in the story, but that's unimportant. From there, the book is pretty much boring, and plotless. She meets Edward in Biology, and he hates her. Then, his eyes change colors and he loves her. Boring things continue, etc. Then, when he tells her she can't love her, because he's really like a villian in a comic book. Meyer then proceeds to bring us to one of the many anticlimactic scenes in the book. We've all seen the commercials, where Bella and Edward are in the forest, speaking as dramatically as they can (which, if the commercials show the skill of the actors in that movie, isn't very dramatic) as Bella figures out the Edward is a vampire. No. In the book, she uses a search engine to look up monsters, finds two stories about vampires that fit Edward's character, and then is convinced that he his one, without directly questioning him.
Meyer's writing (for the first half of the book anyway) is completely horrible. Not only are we subjected to more of what Bella's wearing rather than thinking, we're also subjected to bad dialouge. And once we meet Edward, things go way downhill from there. Meyer literally creates a perfect character, and by perfect, I don't mean the best character ever. I mean, Edward is just perfect. Now you girls may not mind, but most writers and critics will agree that making somebody perfect is not a way to help a story. Yes, it may seem awesome that he can do almost anything, but with no flaw, there's nothing interesting to happen. And even though Bella has seen him and been around him for months, we still have to sit through Meyer telling us how perfect and gorgeous Edward is, everytime Bella is around him. Now, in the second half of the book Meyer's writing gets a little better, and this could be because a plot is finally introduced in the second half, (around page 360 to be exact, which is about 100 pages from the end of the book). But all-in-all I only found one paragraph throughout the entire book that was truly well written. In the book I had it was on page 232, the first full paragraph. Bella describes Phoenix to Edward, and I must admit that it is very well written.
Also, you can't say this book is an extraordinary love story, because, it's not. All the "love" is, is a very Romeo and Juliet-esque obsession. There is a large difference between an obsession and a love of somebody in my opinion. One of them is the fact that, when you're in love with somebody, you shouldn't only think about is how good they look. Bella, our narrator, uses the word perfect, or similar words, to describe Edward every time we see him! We got it the first time your friend told us he was good looking Bella, he's fantastic-looking! The problem with this "love" is that Bella never connects to Edward personally. The only reason he likes her, is her smell, which means that he wants to suck her blood. To get over this fact, he chooses to be nice to her, which ends up with her just being more obsessed with him. So all-in-all this story is not about love at all.
Overall, this book is not good at all. It is poorly written, and the plot is nonexistent most of the time. Out of ten stars I gave this book a two. Yes, I know I said it gets better toward the end, but not nearly enough to rid us of the horrible rest of the book.

Cassie's Review:
7.5 out of 10 stars
Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past 2 years, you know that the Twilight sensation has overrun pop culture, causing millions of teenage girls (and a few moms) to giggle, swoon, and act silly in general. Unfortunately I happen to be one of those girls, although I pride myself on being a fan before the movies swept Hollywood. But aside from the disappointing and overrated movie, how great was Twilight as a debut novel for one of the most promising authors to hit mainstream America?
Vampires have never been my thing, but Twilight was highly recommended to me, so I went in with a positive attitude and an appetite for a good sci-fi romance. I was disappointed with the first few chapters; we meet Bella Swan, who just moved to Forks, Washington to live with her father, Charlie Swan. Bella goes to school, Bella gets a truck, Bella meets new friends, Bella is clumsy, blah, blah. I’m not one for books that start off slow, and Twilight was one of those books. I stuck it out, though. The only interesting thing we find is the introduction of Edward and his family; they don’t socialize with anyone else and are therefore deemed snobby. Bella is intrigued by Edward, and finds herself in class with him. He acts strange, doesn’t talk, and Bella feels awkward. Big deal. A ho-hum start to a novel that’s supposed to be fantastic.
Onward the story goes. It picks up the pace, thankfully, and we’re properly introduced too Edward as a character. Bella is really curious as the relationship between the characters develops and Edward insists he’s a “bad guy”. Through an unlikely set of circumstances, Bella comes to the conclusion that Edward and his family must be vampires, and that she is in love with him.
The rest of the story unfolds, with Bella and Edward’s romance at the center, ending in a semi- climactic race against time; a good conclusion, but written in a way that didn’t really draw on any of the reader’s emotions the way I expected it to. Even with the lackluster ending, I walked away with a good feeling about the book, and I greatly anticipated the sequel.
Meyer seems to have missed a few English classes in school. The writing style was inconsistent, to say the least. It was like ice skating- you were gliding along for a while, and suddenly you hit a rough patch, stumble, get back up, and glide some more, until you hit the next rough spot. And with all his perfection, Edward just seems a little boring. Maybe it’s because I don’t like the moody, secretive type. And Bella has a way of making me roll my eyes, with her self- sacrificing ways and her inability to accept the fact that Edward can kill her with a twitch of his cold, sparkly hand. Although it’s not great style, look at the first Harry Potter books, they’re exactly the same way- Rowling wasn’t so great at structure and variety, either. I have to say, though, that Meyer has a rich vocabulary, more advanced than one would normally find in a teen novel. I learned words like chagrin, vicarious, and glut. I appreciated that Meyer wrote for no particular age group and therefore didn’t dumb down her words; about fifty percent of teen-specific novels are void of intelligent vocabulary.
You might be wondering why I gave seven and a half stars to a book that I didn’t seem to like very much- on the contrary, I greatly enjoyed reading Twilight. It was a good storyline, with interesting (if a little unrealistic) characters and moments of brilliance by Meyer (we find out why vampires don’t go out in the sun, and it’s not because they’ll burn up and die). Meyer also has a way of describing Edward in a way that makes any female wish her boyfriend or husband was undead. Who wouldn’t want someone who looked like a perfect Roman god? Yes, Twilight, with all its flaws, is unexplainably intoxicating. Stephenie Meyer started a phenomenon, sparking many other writers to follow suit with vampire novels of their own, and thereby overrunning bookshelves with the undead (an unfortunate result of Twi-mania). In short, whether you loved it or hated it, Twilight has set the standard for vampires to come, and America remains wrapped around the fictional fingers of Edward and Bella, or in some cases, Jacob. But that’s a discussion for next time.
P.S. If you’re still not willing to give Twilight a try, or you tried and aren’t crazy about it, try Meyer’s other, separate novel, The Host. It has a better developed style and story line, and has absolutely nothing to do with smitten, undead teenagers.
 
As you can see there are two very different ideas of the story, and we want to hear your opinion, so comment below!

JP's Poems

A View
Morning view from the location which I stand,
sacred domain, I like to stay,
here I can see her wake up, and walk her way to the shore,
and dance her feet to the beat of silence.
Her hair blows in the breeze,
and I start to talk to myself, I know she can hear me.

She's got me on highwire, she's in love,
I'm feeling sensational, she's just alive.
I feel like I should walk down from where I stand,
because I'm just a figure in the sky,
and talk to her, and she could show the world to me,
she could show me where to go, and who to be.

In all honesty, I don't want to lie,
but this girl has everything I want and need,
no one else can replace her.
I really really want to give her everything I have,
and just appreciate her for what she is,
and what the world has given.

Run
Bottle up this emotion,
and through into the ocean,
it's my only SOS.
I feel like a lion in the cage,
pushing on the bars with all this unspoken rage,
I just want to be free from this place,
of unfresh being, I just want to find a home.

In this moment, I've got your attention,
I just want somewhere to run to,
because I'm born to run.

Where are you going? they say,
I make it up and paddle on into a new place,
where I can breathe.
I'll take a chance to run because I'm really hard as hell,
comprehend.

Where are you going?

Society Warfare
I'm losing surface and control,
they're pushing back, and taking control,
I've seen to little, yet too much.
The same thing gets old, the same thing gets too damn old.
I've seen too much, yet too little.
Lies and disappointment,
all at the same time.

I feel this cold wave of heat pushing me under,
I feel like I'm on fire, and I can't believe this is really happening,
this angel in front of me just walks past,
the robots all around, man I feel like I'm tripping.
this is the first time this has happened,
this is the first time I've felt so different.

I sense this sensation of sense,
because it could be something worth my time,
and if not it's just a sensational lie.
I really have no idea where I am,
or where these people come from,
uprising and skills are poor,
because they are like everyone else.

Man, this robotic climate of cold,
sure has gotten me cold hearted too,
where I've watched these people evolve into a downgrade,
of what they are, fighting what they need,
and stealing what was not theirs,
the first angel walks past me unharmed and untouched,
yet she keeps walking...

A war is going on, and who knows how to finish it?


If you would like to submit your own poems, contact us here at artisticallyspeaking@ymail.com

Cassie's Pictures

So, here are some pictures drawn by Cassie.

If you want to submit any of your own photos or pictures, e-mail us at artisticallyspeaking@ymail.com